20 November 2008

fraidy cat

our bed arrived and i accepted it. we've got it encased and had an ok night sleeping in the middle of the room.

i've got no new bites. but Shawn has found a couple more bugs (taped to white paper, the best photo I could get was with the macro setting and no flash, since the flash blew out the image too much) - and we're going to try to get the exterminator to come next week while we're gone. That means we have to bag up our stuff in one day, since we're leaving for the airport tomorrow around noon. But the plan is to have them not treat our closets again - or any of the stuff in there ... I'm not sure how that will work out, but whatever. We've got to try something.

The emotional aspect of this is really wearing us out. We're both one mood-swing away from snapping. It's just back and forth - as soon as we're feeling good and positive like "we can survive this" ... something happens - he finds a fat bug, I get more bites or something and we come crashing back to the reality of this unfair, awful and overwhelming situation.

Why can't the university find us a new place to live? As obviously we're unable to clean this one out of the bugs ... The comet SHOULD keep them at bay, and another spraying would help I'm sure, but there's no way to fully rid ourselves of the bugs. Not to mention any way to get ourselves over the trauma.

I think I need a therapist. I've gone to therapy before. But in this big, horrible city that I loathe, there's just no way to find a place. It's disjointed and awful.

And yes, I am feeling incredibly negative today. My T-shirt smells musty - even though it was washed recently (everything I own was washed recently!) ... I misplaced my lavender drawer sachets somewhere ...

and I've lost my crochet hooks. I have one of them - the one I'm working with on the bedspread, but I wanted to do a few snowflakes with some different thread and hook ... and the hooks are no where to be found. they could be in the closet, but i don't remember. and i am frightened that i tossed them accidentally ... all the hooks i've used to make my many projects. those hooks have memories. ack, i've got to get over myself.

i can't wait to go home tomorrow, although i won't technically be HOME until Sunday afternoon...

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