02 May 2014

You Look Pretty Today

via Flickr user busse
I'm not the greatest small talk-er, but I've noticed that a lot of initial small talk has to do with how you look. And I am the WORST at complimenting people on their looks, even when I think it to myself. It isn't too hard to comment on someone's clothes or new hairstyle, but to just say "You look great," isn't an easy thing for me to do.

Part of it is just my own awkward craziness or feeling like it comes off as disingenuous. But could part of it be an intentional stance against making appearance the paramount connection to other people? Or could it be my own appearance and my own belief about it?

On googling to find an image to go with this post I came across this blog post that sums it up a possible reason for my diversion, although on the flip side because she's writing about receiving compliments:
"I hate it because it reminds me how much people are constantly looking at each other and judging others’ entire lives based on thinness, youthful appearance and shallow versions of beauty."
I don't have as much of a reaction when someone comments on my appearance, mostly because that's rare, except when my weight fluctuates down -- then I get lots of "you look great" and "wow" type comments. They're nice, and they do make me feel good.

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