silvermari & the stick

Mardi Gras Grinch

I've lived in south Louisiana for more than eight years. My first Mardi Gras season included a couple of Baton Rouge parades and one in New Orleans. I had a BLAST at the Baton Rouge one, and I really enjoyed collecting beads and throws.

New Orleans was different -- we had to park far away, we got soaking wet from rain and the other people along the parade route were rude and ungracious. I still don't understand the etiquette -- is neutral ground where anyone is allowed to stand? And anything else people have to stake out for days or hours in advance? There was so much space and so many throws! It left a bad impression anyway, and I didn't want to get into a physical fight with drunk people so we moved away to behind some barriers at a turn where no people were (because the riders would have to throw farther and you'd get less stuff).

Then my morning sickness started on the way back from that first NOLA parade, and so forevermore I will associate the smell of cheap plastic Mardi Gras beads with nausea. Ugh. That started the aversion to Mardi Gras season, parades in particular.

Now with two kids who are native Louisianans I should be more into the parade scene, right? WRONG. I am still very much a Mardi Gras grinch, probably even more so factoring in the hassle of taking children to parades.

Basically now we only go to Southdowns, a family-friendly, low-key parade that is near our house. We still have to drive, but we understand the timing now, know a family who lives near enough to walk near the parade's start, so after it passes we can get back in the car and scoot back home. It's at night, but still doable. Even that doesn't seem "worth it," but we go anyway.

The idea of taking my kids to a double-digit number of parades EACH YEAR astounds me. I've read tips and tricks and poems and other blog posts from New Orleans moms about that very idea -- and they're doing it whole heartedly. It baffles me. What is the point?!

So my question is - am I alone in my grinchness? Or is there a quiet minority that doesn't prioritize the parades, the accumulation of crap (we have enough without competing for it!) and the inevitable melt downs (by mama and/or the kids)?

I'm still down to jam to Mardi Gras mambo and for kids' trike parades. I don't crave king cake, but that's mostly OK with me too and is certainly a marker of the season. But the parades seem like too much work for very little pay off. Clearly my mindset is different as an outsider, an introvert and a lazy person!

Things I Bought in Danville Over the Holiday Break

We just got back from a week-long trip to my husband's parents' house. It was actually a fairly low-stress visit, although we didn't get any snow like we'd been wishing for. (It DID snow in Oklahoma, of all the nerve... something like 4 inches!)

While we were there I bought a few things, and I thought I would catalog them in case anyone else finds the humor and absurdity as I do. Here's the list, as best I recall, because I don't track my receipts in any logical fashion (in fact I'm searching for a missing Walmart one to return a clip-on light that won't actually work on a bunk bed, but I digress).

Three $3 pillows at Target, since the "no-flat" pillows provided had gone flat LONG ago. These are not great pillows, obviously, but we made them work for one week. (There was oddly one pillow that was fine, as it was the "crib" pillow and rarely used. I made Liv use a flat pillow, since she uses flat-ish pillows at home!)
$13 slippers at Target because my feet hurt when they aren't in shoes and the skipper socks I packed didn't provide enough support.
Target clearance -- I hit Target at the 50% mark and at the 90% mark. At 50% I got a few cookie/candy things (I didn't hit the sauce while at my in-laws, but let me tell you I HIT the sugar hard ... pretty sure I'm making the wrong choice, health-wise, but here we are). At 90% off I was able to find several really great clothes deals -- mainly shirts and sweaters for the girls for next year but also SOCKS -- 50 cents for a pack of six kids' socks in holiday themes. I got two packs but at the register realized I should have got them all -- in all sizes -- as they would easily be donated to the "Sock It To Them" drive the libraries here do every December. I also got some gift tags and a sticker scene for the girls, and wishing I'd bought multiples of that too, as it would have been a cheap (30 cent!) gift to pass out to classmates next year (although this year I didn't even do ANY gifts for classmates ... it slipped my mind entirely with the mid-December school play eating up most of my brain band-width). I also got the girls a set of 10 Bonne Bell lip balms to share and a mascara 4-pack, both for 50% off. My very best purchase was a $1.49 Hello Kitty flannel night gown that fits Jane now and SHOULD still fit next year. She was DELIGHTED and my only sadness was there wasn't one in Livia's size or anything remotely comparable!
Hobby Lobby clearance -- we checked it out when it was 80% off and all I got was a frame ornament (mother-in-law mentioned that she doesn't have many (any?) ornaments with just Livia's picture), some snowflake paper (not sure why -- I don't do a holiday letter, don't have many people to WRITE letters to anymore, but maybe the girls will like to use it next year). The frame ornament was missing its backing and any little plastic piece that might sit in front of the picture, but otherwise it was fine and those things seem easy enough to hack with recycling materials. Shawn's cousin's son was working the register, but we couldn't talk him into a further (or five finger!) discount -- LOL!
Hallmark clearance -- we went to the mall to "walk around" and most of the stores were pretty sparse. The girls got Mary Poppins bobbleheads at Hot Topic, but Shawn bought those, not me. I got my mother-in-law another frame ornament at the Hallmark Christmas clearance. Only 50% off, but it was cute and grandparent themed.
Food Lion -- a variety of groceries, mostly for the snacky New Year's Eve supper I like to eat: summer sausage, velveeta-rotel cheese dip and chips, onion dip and chips, sparkly grape juice, and cheese and crackers. I made my mother-in-law pay for most of the other groceries -- for the suppers I made, meatloaf, mac & green beans and spaghetti, salad and cheesy bread. She also covered the lunch and breakfast stuff, the girls' foods and even my Diet Coke! (She actually bought Diet Dr Pepper, and it was a refreshing change.) I also had to buy some ibuprofen, a new, softer toothbrush and some kid toothpaste (I really thought they would run out, but Shawn managed to make the meager, flat tube last the whole week).
Marshall's & Ross -- these get confused because it was one trip, but I bought a grey cardigan (probably my fifth?!), but this one is darker and has a different detail with some elastic in the back to give it some shape. I also bought a pack of thank you cards, since I never remember to pack enough (I wasn't expecting more gifts for the girls from cousins' families, but we did get a few things, including a book Jane loved about Princess Jasmine, so I think we need to watch Aladdin soon), and a 5x7 frame for a black & white picture of Liv I brought to my in-laws as a gift. I ALMOST bought 2 small reindeer-dressed Cabbage Patch dolls that smelled so great and were SO cute, but I didn't (although looking at prices online of the current iterations it was less than a third of retail price!). I did buy a few discounted Christmas books to add to our collection -- that's the only thing I have left to do to put away Christmas, wrap and pack our 48 Advent books for Christmas 2019.

In addition to the Cabbage Patch dolls that I didn't buy, I tried on a couple fancy dresses that didn't make the cut, mainly because I don't really NEED fancy dresses or have a good place to wear them. But also I was overstuffed with stuff to get home as it was. I almost bought a "Joy" holiday sweater at an outlet place near Hobby Lobby, but my mother-in-law pointed out the makeup stain on the back, and even at $6.50 I didn't feel like trying to get it out. I'll probably think about that sweater anyway, especially next year when I need something to wear to a sweater party! (Unfortunately it's rarely cold enough for sweaters like that ... so maybe I'll get over it when the heat cranks back up outside.)

We're home, I got an amazing night sleep although still tired from the travel and the non-stop work today putting away Christmas stuff. I wasn't the best for my kids -- seeing all the excess Christmas gifts and piles of things lying around didn't help. I didn't purchase anything today, as I was able to make our meager cupboard work for one more day, but I know tomorrow I'll be hitting that grocery store HARD.

Hope your 2019 is bright!

Another November in the Books

Our Boy Scouts wreath was delivered today, and it is a gorgeous day. In a normal place it would be early fall or even late summer. Tons of leaves on the ground, warm breezes and sunshine. I thought it was supposed to rain, but I guess I don't pay enough attention to the news while it's on! Maybe it shifted to rain overnight instead.

I'm doing my annual calendar creation, and it's hard to whittle down a year's worth of photos into a couple dozen (I stretch it to 3 or 4 dozen because I put multiple on each calendar spread).

And I'm trying to decide on Christmas cards. The girls had photos taken at Livia's school and they came out cute so I bought them digitally. They're black and white, which is supposed to be arty. But I wish they were color anyway. Oh well.

Our house is mostly decorated for Christmas/Advent. We have a few things to add -- Jane would like some more felt ornaments for the tree, and there are Advent decorations that we will make as the season progresses (assuming my sanity doesn't lose its grip any more than it already has).

I have a Christmas party tonight for the moms at Livia's school. I am trying to be someone I'm not -- or at least someone who attends social gatherings without anxiety or upset. It might end up being fun, but we'll see. I'm taking wheat thins and plates, so I have an excuse to get there on time... It starts at 7:30 so I won't get out of most of bedtime routine!

I've found pleasure in writing daily, and I always think at the end of November that I'll keep up the momentum. Not writing daily but perhaps twice weekly or so. So far that has never held out, and I'm sure with the busy-ness of December the blog will also fall by the wayside. I love it too much to EVER give it up I think.

Time for carpool. Peace out, November!

Bible in 90: Accomplishment UNLOCKED

Kindle Screen adding CEB to my "read" shelf on GoodReads

I finished the Bible in 90 today, which I started on September 1. I read from Genesis through Revelation in 90 days.

Being a rule follower I read the prescribed passages each day and didn't jump ahead (and luckily didn't fall behind). The only day I broke was when I finished Ruth instead of leaving a chapter unread. (I did a study on Ruth with our most recent former pastor, so it makes more sense to me and reminds me of him.)

Shawn asked me for my favorite part to prove I'd really read it all -- LOL. I highlighted several passages in my Kindle -- I read the Common English Bible version on my Kindle so there were few footnotes (and they were all hidden/you had to click the superscript letter, which I only ever did accidentally). My favorite, weird/never noticed them passages were:

All the tables are covered with vomit, filth overruns the place. Isaiah 28:8

I will scatter feces on your faces, the feces of your festivals. Malachi 2:3

Maybe I'm into the prophets (nah) or maybe just bodily functions (nope again). Really I just love good potty humor?!

It will be WEIRD to not have to read tomorrow. Each day took 30-45 minutes to read (I'm on the faster side), and I did it in all different places. I wasn't good about a routine, but I always got it done in the 24-hour day. I read in carpool, with kids bouncing around me and on my own when both were at school and my work/volunteer stuff was under control.

Bring it on, Advent!

What to Expect at the LSU Holiday Spectacular

Last night I took the girls to the LSU Holiday Spectacular, which is a kick off event for the holidays hosted by the LSU Faculty & Staff Senate (I think). Like with the trick-or-treat down the row there is little information online about what to expect. But now that I've been I know! Although it's likely that they change things year-to-year, but here's what happened this year.

For parking I think the Barnes & Noble parking garage is the easiest. It's just a few bucks and you have covered parking that's an easy walk to the Student Union, where the event took place. The girls also love any chance to ride in an elevator (on our way back to the car we rode to the top floor -- looked out over the campus at night -- and then rode back to 2 for our car). A lot of the people who come are already on campus though, so it's less of a deal for them to find parking!

The event took place in the lobby area -- just up the middle outside stairs that face the quad. There weren't really signs or hordes of people streaming in, and there was some other Christmas-themed event with the Coca-Cola holiday truck and music playing outside. We figured out where to go when we saw the lighted Christmas tree inside.

There was a front desk where we checked in -- handed over the food item donations (or you can take a toy for Toys for Tots) -- and the girls were each given a bag and a treat bag with candy and a coupon for something -- pizza and games at Mr Gatti's maybe. Then we went to the craft areas at different tables. Lots of different on campus offices were represented. The girls made ornaments, picture frames and colored some pictures. Jane even got to play the drums (thankfully while wearing headphones so only she could hear her stylings).

After we did that section -- which was arranged around the line to wait to see Santa Claus (who we did not wait for -- if we'd had another adult to do the waiting that would have been fine, but we had to maximize our time and get home for bed at a reasonable hour) -- we went to the food area where there was free pizza, balloon artists and door prizes.

A hot tip: go directly to the door prizes. There's no actual drawing. What you do is turn in your raffle tickets (and if you do it directly there's less chance of losing them!) and you get to pull a sucker from a foam tree. If your sucker's bottom is colored you win a prize! Livia and I both won, and we were lucky that they still had prizes left. They were running out by the time we made it over close to 7. I got a $20 Walmart gift card (the prizes are separated between kids and adults), and Liv's was a wrapped gift that turned out to be an Emoji game of some sort -- it has two vests with Velcro and several Velcro balls and you play tag with your sister trying to get the balls to stick to her vest. We're planning to try it out this afternoon -- I'm glad it's something the girls can share and seems like a good back yard game. Jane's sucker did not have a colored end, so she didn't "win," but they did give her a little bag of additional treats and candy that seems just as fun.

There were also free drinks - as in Coke products and Dasani water. There was a lot of pizza, although we had eaten before we went to the event so we didn't try it. It was pretty crowded and with only one of me and two of them it was hard to maneuver and keep us together, especially as my hands got filled up with drying crafts, balloon creations and such. Another tip would be to bring a tote bag for your loot -- something you can sling over a shoulder instead of in your hands and would fit more than the small plastic bags provided.

The event was 6-8 and we were there about 6-7:20. In addition to Santa there was Mike the Tiger, the Chik-fil-A cow, the Grinch (eeek!), Mrs. Claus, a snowman and reindeer wandering around for pictures. I'm glad we checked it out, and I hope next year Shawn can come with us to help with the juggling of the stuff.

Happiest

December 2011
I am the luckiest.

In Sunday school we veered away from our usual topic (which is whatever the sermon is about) because there was no sermon during the Hanging of the Greens service. We also talked about steps to become a reconciling community and how our Thanksgivings were. But toward the end one friend asked a question she asked during Thanksgiving -- what's a day in your life where you remember being your happiest?

I did not answer. Others talked about unexpected free days with nothing to do/nothing planned. My answer has to do with my babies. And this friend who asked the question happens to be walking through a time of infertility. I remember what it feels like and wouldn't want to blindside her. I remember the offhand remarks people made when it took so long for me to become pregnant. (Specifically cutting, and probably something I've mentioned on here before: "you know, Mari, babies grow up," as if I only wanted a baby and didn't ACTUALLY want all that parenting entails.)

It's hard to pin down a specific day, but my happiest times were sitting in my nursing chair with a new-ish baby. I was on maternity leave with Jane, had no responsibilities other than keeping her alive, and I was good at that. I had a great, still-new-to-me back yard view, the temperatures were nice after she was born and stayed cool/comfortable for a while. (Weather affect my mood more than I'd like to admit I think.)

I remember my girls' early babyhood as happy and content times in my life. Livia's is less vivid in my memory, probably because the juggle with Jane and that transition takes up some of the computer memory space of my brain's hard drive. But I know the bone-deep joy from caring for the baby you created, carried and birthed. And that was certainly my happiest time, even with sleep deprivation that I know I was experiencing simultaneously.

Speaking of happy -- I got a lot of happy birthday wishes on social media, mainly Facebook. It STILL kills me that some people write "Happy Birthday, Mary" even though my name is RIGHT THERE. That Indiahoma education for you I guess... For the last 2 years or more I have not written anything on most people's Facebook pages for their birthdays. There are exceptions - immediate family mainly, and even then I probably post ABOUT them and tag them on my wall. (Of course people I am close with in real life get a direct email or text birthday wish!) But seeing the cross-section of people on my life who remembered me (even when it was just Facebook saying "hey, it's this dummy's birthday") made me feel a little happier actually. So perhaps I should resume the ritual of "HBD" on others' walls. MAYBE...

38 Trips Around the Sun

Hello to being a 38-year-old lady. In all its no-makeup, blotchy and wrinkled skin, but still fairly happy glory. Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!

I bought myself new Nike tennis shoes, because I wore out my previous sneakers in all the walking and activity in Minneapolis. That Kaep ad really got me. (Actually these were just a good enough deal on early Black Friday Penney's shopping.)

I have a present from Shawn and a couple from my mom to open later. Because Jane has piano lessons tonight we can't go out to eat. We'll probably go out to celebrate on Wednesday (tomorrow evening we have something else!).

Livia gave me the best birthday present with a nice potty experience! We're not there yet, but we're definitely on our way to potty training goals. She's filling up a chart with stickers and likes to say she's "pee trained"!

A Life Lived in Books

I just finished the book "I'd Rather Be Reading," by Anne Bogel. It was a QUICK read, but I enjoyed it. She writes a blog and has a podcast focused on reading, and this was a memoir-ish retrospective about reading and the reading life. I liked it, and it made me think about my journey as a reader. This would be much better as a thought-out, drafted and edited piece, but this can just be my initial, quick reactions because NaBloPoMo content doesn't write itself, you know?!

For one, I was SUPER jealous that for a time she lived in a house next door to a library. What a great real estate perk! I am an avid library user, but as time goes on I mainly do my reading on my Kindle. So in a way it's like the library is even closer since it's always in my house! For the girls' books of course we visit the library weekly, and we are on first-name basis with our librarians. We are working our way through the children's picture book section, and Jane is graduating to chapter books. But I'm realizing that all the series we loved with Jane (Elephant and Piggie, Biscuit, Fancy Nancy, Olivia, etc.) we need to revisit for Livia. And I get confused about which books we've read recently and which we read once-upon-a-time when Jane was Liv's age. Keeps things interesting!

Bogel had a chapter (they're really stand alone essays collected in a book, but they're all on the theme of reading and the reading life) about wishing she could see her library check out history. I agree that it would be a trip down memory lane. I have a Swiss cheese memory, as those close to me can attest, and I don't remember most of what I read I'm sure. But being able to see the title and date would bring at least some of the content and messages back to me. Of course there ARE books that stick (Ramona will forever be tied now to Jane's early elementary days, and I re-read Anne of Green Gables and ALL its sequels while I was pregnant with her), but being able to review my history back to childhood would be amazing.

I realize there are privacy concerns of course, and we don't ACTUALLY want libraries to keep that intel (because it could theoretically then be used against us in a court of law?!). Bogel recommends -- strongly recommends -- keeping track of what you read, and I do that via GoodReads. Since I do most of my reading on the Kindle I can just click a button (add to shelf or something like that) at the end of the book and it's auto-magically added to my GoodReads shelf on the correct date. I add any books that I read in hard copy manually to the site. I've got a few years of data this way, but I certainly don't have my reading logs from my 20s or childhood. It's probably the best that's lost to history?! I like the idea of a beautiful reading journal, but I would be less likely to fill it out (as both girls' hard copy baby books can attest!)

I have a whole slew of books to add to my To Be Read list, because Bogel wrote about some of her favorites or things that really touched her. Some things I had read (like Anne of Green Gables), but others were new recommendations that I'd like to check out.

One thing I just realized is anything I highlight in my Kindle shows up on GoodReads. Thankfully it's private/not shared with my friends on there, but that's great to know. I knew they were still available to me because I get a daily email from Readwise with a couple highlighted passages from books past. It's nice to unearth things that were important, and again I wish I had that data/info going back longer than just a couple years. Anyway, in the book I highlighted every book she mentioned that I wanted to read too, so that's an easy way to capture them.

Two baskets of Advent books
waiting for Dec. 1-24

One quote that I highlighted was that "taking those photos are a gift I give my future self," and I so believe that's true. (This was part of her argument for documenting what you read -- the parallels to taking photos to capture and re-remember events down the line.) I absolutely am on board with both those things, and I appreciate my past self's gifts very much.

One concrete - and very relevant - example isn't photos but books. Advent books wrapped for this season, which I did late last year when I was packing up the Christmas stuff before our sabbatical move. I wrapped 48 Christmas-themed books in tissue paper. One for each girl for each day of the Advent season.

Waiting is hard, but a good book ALWAYS makes the waiting go faster.

Making Merry Early-ish

Gran's Ceramic Christmas Tree
Plays White Christmas

It feels weird to be decorating the house for Christmas before my birthday, and with a FULL week of November left. But if we didn't do it this weekend we would have to wait until NEXT weekend. This gives us extra time to enjoy the decorations (and extra time for me to spot and fill any gaps!).

Shawn decorated our walkway with the lights and lighted candy canes (Candy Cane Lane as we call it) and got the tree up, although it still needs to be decorated. I've got the various other decorations out -- stockings, kid crafts through the years hung on the walls with tape, stuffed animals, tchotchkes, framed photos.

And one of my favorites: Gran's ceramic Christmas tree. It has a wind up in the back that plays White Christmas. I coveted this thing for years, and toward the end of her life Gran didn't get it out anymore (it's fragile and fussy to get all the little plastic pegs in their holes). She gave it to me when I asked about it, but I haven't always gotten it out when I have little kids running around. Hopefully I'm not running too big a risk this year! The wiring is ancient -- that cord is probably older than me -- but it still works. I think I have replaced the bulb, but it shines brightly now. It adds a nice ambiance when the lights are out -- the regular tree lights plus this. I have it on my crochet cabinet that Shawn made me last year for Christmas, so it's nice and sturdy and the girls so far seem OK to just look at it.

Our regular tree is one of the pre-lit kinds, and we've had it for several years (maybe 6 or 7?), so some of its lights have died. We bought some strands of lights at the end of last year and used those -- they look a little weird (some are huge bulbs and others are small, neither match the lights that came with the tree itself). And one of the strands can switch from multi-colored to white. So you know Jane picked multi-colored, making the tree look EXTRA crazy. Once we get our ornaments on I'll take a picture. I plan to start this evening -- have got baking to do for our church's Advent festival tomorrow plus groceries don't make themselves. (We still have an overload of Thanksgiving leftovers, but the girls won't eat any of them, and I am nervous about eating them too long because they were left out for HOURS after the meal on Thursday -- a risk when you're eating at someone else's house!)

Movie Going

The girls and I went to the movies today (rather than clean or set up Christmas stuff -- maybe I'll tackle that tomorrow).

We saw Ralph Wrecks the Internet. We'd never seen the original, Wreck-It Ralph, but our friend gave us a synopsis last night when we said we were going. It was OK, and the mildly tense parts weren't too scary for Jane.

We went to the Movie Tavern because it's so convenient to knock out a movie and lunch together. But man it's expensive. There was also a 9:30 at a regular theater type, and that might have been better. But we had such a late night (not in bed until after 9 for the girls since it was bath night and we'd been hanging by a wood burning fire so hair needed to get washed anyway), I didn't know that we'd be able to rally and get around by then. (We were almost ready by 9:30, but it would have been pushing it.)

It wasn't as crowded as I expected, and there were many free seats. This theater isn't really near shopping, but I'd still think today would be a big movie day. I'd preferred to have seen something else, but kid choices are limited.

The movie crossed over into Livia's nap, so after she ate her food (and she demolished the chicken tenders and fruit cup), she climbed into my lap. I ALWAYS have to go to the bathroom in movies -- no matter how much I do or don't drink -- so it was tricky at the end. She melted down on the car ride home, and we were able to get her a short nap. Hope that doesn't wreck bedtime tonight!

I like doing out and doing things with my girls, but I hate when it's not appreciated and I have to deal with yelling on the way home. (Liv wasn't the only one who melted down.) Screen time in ANY form seems to do a number on my girls.

All is fine now, and they're playing play doh. I'd really like to see Mary Poppins Returns -- maybe something we can do during our trip to see Shawn's family right after Christmas.

Speaking of, I think I'll start unpacking some boxes and decorating here and there. (Tree isn't up yet -- that's a Shawn job!)

Turkey Day

Two gobblin' turkey hats

In addition to my meal preparations, I also got to work crocheting a couple turkey hats for my turkey girls. I started yesterday, so it was a rushed job. I finished just a few minutes ago, cutting it close before our 3 p.m. meal.

They're reminiscent of hats I made when Jane was little -- her second Thanksgiving, and she had just turned 1. (That was the year I wrote about all the TV shows I watched as my NaBloPoMo fodder. HA.) But I did change things up a little, giving the turkeys cross eyes (reminiscent of Hei Hei from Moana, which incidentally is leaving Netflix soon so I think I'll probably buy a copy -- should I get an actual DVD or just a digital/streaming version, like from Amazon?).

I made Jane's hat too big because I was working on it after she went to bed. It's big enough for my giant melon, which should have been a clue it was too big. She wants to wear Liv's, which is only slightly small for her. Crochet stretches so it's not bad. The feathers were the last things added, and if I'd had more time I could have devised a plan to crochet around pipe cleaners to give them some structure. I tried but couldn't work it out in the 30 minutes of crochet time I had left. So floppy feathers it is. The snoods on the beaks are pretty cute though -- I didn't crochet them down so they're a little floppy too, but in a good way.

Not sure if the girls will actually wear them (please, please, please let me get a Facebook pic!), but I'm hoping we'll still have a pleasant Thanksgiving experience at our friends' house.

Happy Turkey Day!

Preparing for a Feast

We're going to be home, just the four of us, for Thanksgiving. I bought a smallish turkey (11 lbs), the smallest I could find anyway. And I got ingredients to make deviled eggs, cranberry salad, green bean casserole, cornbread dressing, pumpkin pie, sweet potato casserole (at Jane's request) and mashed potatoes & gravy.

On Monday we got an invitation to come to Thanksgiving at a church friend's house. Regular Mari's knee-jerk reaction was NO. I've planned, I'm cooking and I want to have the leftovers. But after talking to Shawn and then Jane, and finding out they both definitely wanted to go I decided "OK."

Look at me being flexible! (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

When I told our host that yes, we'd like to come, but I that already bought a turkey, she said to bring it and she would be glad to not have to make one! (She will have ham, sides and desserts.) In my reply I said OK, and that I would also have to bring the dressing and cranberry salad (can't eat turkey without dressing, and the cranberries are fresh so they wouldn't keep -- although can you freeze berries? Maybe so). Then I told her the other things (minus the deviled eggs!) I'd been planning to make and she said to bring all those too.

My little sous chefs!

SO, now I am halfway through my Thanksgiving feast preparations, AND I have to figure out how to transport them all. Today I did the deviled eggs and pumpkin pies (both with help from Jane, who is 7 and able to actually be helpful -- although our kitchen is much to small for more than one cook), sweet potato casserole, cranberry salad and cornbread dressing. I took zero pictures of the food -- before, during or after. Hrm. Looking back looks like the last time I took pictures of food was 2015. Can't imagine why...

At first I thought I would use one of the many delivery boxes we've got and stack the casseroles with cardboard between. I may still use a carton for the turkey (which I'm debating carving here for ease of transport and I've NEVER made a beautiful bird), but I pulled out my casserole carriers and I happen to have 3, one of which is a double, so I think I can carry the sweet potato casserole, dressing, green bean casserole and mashed potatoes (I guess I'll put them in a casserole dish too). I'm mostly using my disposable pans, although my cranberry salad is in Shawn's grandma's bowl as usual. I can probably put the sliced up turkey into another disposable casserole pan, but I'd have to put it in a box/carton to carry it. The pie and cranberry salad will have to be separate. Oh, and I plan to whip cream so I'll need a way to carry it. I wish I had a thermos to carry the gravy (either making it or warming from a jar -- although maybe if I do the jar I can just do that at the hosts' house).

The meal will be at 3, which is a weird time for us with kids. Usually I make my meal about noon, just as the parade is ending. So I plan to serve deviled eggs and pigs-in-a-blanket (both Shawn's faves) around 11 to tide us over to the big meal at 3. Livia will be able to take her nap while I finish up everything.

After the turkey roasts I need at least an hour to bake the other things (dressing, sweet potato casserole, green bean casserole), so the turkey needs to come out by 1:45 at the latest. (Our hosts' house is about 15 minutes away and we should probably get there a little before the meal starts since we're bringing a lot of food!) If it takes 3 hours to cook that means it needs to go in at 10:45, so I'll probably try to put it in at 10:15. That's much better than waking up to put it in at 7! My oven can hold the three casseroles at once so they can bake together. The disposable pans mean they need cookie sheets under them, so I should probably double check that I can fit that many in. I'll have to use the toaster oven for the pigs-in-a-blanket, so I'm glad I have that as an option.

Wish me luck - GOBBLE GOBBLE.

Movie Memory Lane

We have been watching old musicals around here, mostly checking out from the library. It started with Mary Poppins, which we watched because one of the girls' friends dressed up as her for Halloween (and coincidentally so did our cousin's family, which we saw on Facebook later!). The girls both liked it, and Jane especially liked that the little girl was named Jane! The songs were a big hit, and we've listened to the sound track multiple times (it's available free with Amazon Prime music). It was just a REALLY long movie, at more than 2.5 hours. Many scenes could have been edited tighter and some eliminated. But times have changed, as have attention spans I guess?! Jane had no trouble watching it all the way through, but Livia was bored in some parts. Not sure if we'll try to see Mary Poppins Returns in theaters, but I do look forward to watching it at some point.

From there we watched Bedknobs and Broomsticks and then Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, which is one I probably had seen at Great Aunt Norma Lee's house because we would rent and watch movies often when we would stay there. CCBB wasn't a favorite, but it does have a couple of great songs. It too was a LONG movie, nearly 3 hours, and could have used editing even more than Mary Poppins. The first copy we got was scratched, so we had to track down another copy at a different library branch. And just yesterday I noticed it's available on Amazon Prime, so Jane wants to watch it again. Since we're on Thanksgiving break we plan to do that this afternoon (starting before Livia gets up from her nap so she doesn't have to watch ALL of it again, even though I'm sure she'd say she does want to see it all).

I've started thinking about other movies that were old when I watched them as a kid that Jane hasn't seen. She's kind of sensitive and gets scared easily (let's not talk about The Grinch - Jim Carrey version - shall we?), but the older movies, especially musicals, seem to have enough whimsy and make it clear what's pretend scary (or even what they try to show as scary is just silly when it's being sung!).

There's The Wizard of Oz, and also Heidi, the Shirley Temple version. I looked that up on Amazon and there was a DVD available for about $4, so Jane's getting that in her stocking! I know we watched a few other Shirley Temple movies on repeat, but I can't remember now. I'm sure I could find them just by looking at her Wikipedia page. Sound of Music is another one (and also LONG!) that Jane might enjoy. There are also a lot of Disney movies Jane hasn't seen (Beauty & the Beast, Lion King, etc.), and we can probably find those via the library.

Do you have any movie recommendations that would be suitable for a 7-year-old with a sensitive side -- either from when you were a kid or current favorites?

Ramona Forever!

(I wonder if Johnny Depp got his Winona Forever tattoo because of it sounding like Ramona Forever? LOL, just kidding. And now it's "Wino Forever.")

One of Jane's birthday gifts was the complete set of Ramona books by Beverly Cleary. We've listened to the entire series on audio from the library (oh, how we love Overdrive!). Stockard Channing is the narrator and she is AMAZING. I would listen to anything she read, but sadly this is the only audiobook I could find that she has ever narrated. She doesn't even have a celebrity memoir! C'mon, Stockard, get on that! I tell everyone about the audio when it comes up -- it is really that good.

We have also worked our way through reading the series via the library. We've found there are different illustrators for different versions of the books. They were written over a span of 40 years or so (1950s until 1990s), but they keep being re-released with new illustrations. Jane likes the most recent illustrations best, probably because those are the main ones we've been reading. The set she got for her birthday has different/probably older illustrations, so when she re-reads them she'll get to see new-to-her pictures! (Livia is also "reading" them, which is pretty funny. She calls them "Mona" books.)

As a treat we checked out the Ramona & Beezus movie that came out a few years ago - we checked it out at the library. It was full of somewhat famous people, but it wasn't a good movie by any stretch of the imagination. They tried to cram in too many of the stories from the book into the movie, and do it within a month or so of Ramona's life onscreen. It was still fun to see some of our favorite stories acted out, and I think Jane liked it more than I did. Was a little disappointing.

I remember a Ramona movie or series or something that starred Sarah Polley when I was a kid. I may be mis-remembering, but the Ramona journal I had as a kid had her picture on it -- whether it was Sarah or a different actress. Aha! Wikipedia for the win, it was Sarah Polley! It looks like you can buy the series for $30 on an unknown-to-me website.

Jane and I are almost finished with Ramona's World, the final book in the series that came out in 1999 (!). We read a chapter or two each night before bed. After that we have plenty else to read, but Ramona will always, always, always have a special place in my heart. And I guess I'll get to read through them at least once more with my baby girl Livia!

Sundays Are So Hard

Sundays are my busy work days, even though I don't actually work!

We go to worship on Sunday mornings, then Sunday school afterward. Getting the kids out and where they need to be, back and forth, and keeping them mostly quiet and entertained is exhausting. I also record the sermon almost every week (I do have backup who did it while we were on sabbatical), so I'm moving the camera around and setting all that up. Then after we get home I have to edit, save and post the video to Vimeo using iMovie (not my favorite program). I also publish it 2-3 places on our website plus Facebook and Twitter, and I make a matching slider for the website home page. The video takes forever to save and upload -- such a time suck.

Each Sunday I write my weekly email about my girls that goes to their grandparents and some aunts and a cousin. That takes a long time to process photos and write about our week (using the photos to remember!), and sometimes I make a video mash up of the video clips I've taken in the week. (I have not done this today yet!)

Sunday evenings at 4:30 the girls have swim lessons. Luckily we have them in class at the same time (different teachers, same pool) so it's time efficient. But it's still one more thing to do and a time point/thing to rush to when I'm usually not quite finished with things when it's time to start getting suits on and into the car.

Today was a special church conference, so I had to go back to church at noon. That sucked up about an hour. I also still make the meals for everyone - lunch and supper (just sandwiches at lunch and leftovers at supper).

Jane has not been feeling well, and on Tuesday we had her well check at the doctor who said she had an ear infection. (She'd gone to urgent care last Sunday and they said it wasn't an infection -- I'm inclined to believe our pediatrician!) Our doctor prescribed an antibiotic but said since Jane was feeling better she might not need it. Well, Jane is still feeling bad and crying off and on. Although she says her ear doesn't hurt (but will sometime admit it feels weird), we're starting the medicine. So I had to go to the pharmacy to get it. It's not far away, but it's another errand to add -- about 15 minutes.

Livia had trouble falling asleep for her nap, so I had to rock her a little bit, even though Shawn was the one who put her down. That's just another 15-20 minutes eaten up (I do normal child care of course, but on the weekends I have Shawn's help and like to do LESS!).

Also today I had a special request to make a flier for a food drive being done at Jane's school for our church's food pantry. I like doing things like that, but it sucks up more time than I should let it (and I'm still not done).

There's a free (just pay $7 shipping) calendar on Shutterfly that I want to make, and I had to write this blog post. I stayed up too late last night watching SNL (which I didn't find that funny -- I turned it off after Weekend Update). OH! And I haven't read my Bible reading for today (that takes 30-45 minutes). At least we're in Acts, which is interesting and story-like. I have ONE more Rizolli & Isles to watch on Hulu, so I hope I can get everything done in time to do that!

Just hope the girls get in bed on time, that Jane falls asleep and STAYS asleep. We have a special church thing in the morning (thankfully no school all week so if she's sick we can manage without missing much). Shawn can stay home in the morning so I can still go/take Livia, but I really want Jane to come as she's finally old enough to understand what we're doing by buying other kids gifts so they can have a good Christmas. We still have Angel Tree kids to shop for, so I guess I can include her in that if this thing tomorrow doesn't work out.

After a nice, lazy day yesterday with only laundry, groceries and watching a DVD, today has been a real grind. And I'm ready for a rest.

Eye Makeup Artistry

I fall down rabbit holes of time sucks on the Internet, and one of my favorites is Facebook video. I can scroll, scroll, scroll and watch (muted) videos of people making cakes, painting nails, giving various life hacks and tips, and -- maybe my favorite -- putting on makeup.

Krystal Clear Makeup might be my favorite of those. She has that vacant, weird stare after she puts on the makeup, but then just before the video ends she cracks and does a big smile that's so cute. She's also really good at putting on makeup!

Wedding Makeup Attempt

Unfortunately, I am NOT good at putting on makeup. I went to the Clinique counter to get some foundation -- so I could get the right color and hoping it would work better with my dry, aging skin. The stuff I bought is fine, and I'm nervous about going through it too quickly. It's very light, and I didn't realize how pale I really am -- it matches my neck according to the counter lady who helped me. It really covers up the redness I wasn't aware was so prominent. But it also makes me look a little chalky and highlights the "flaws" of my skin. If you don't look too closely though it looks great, so that's that. (I have a back-up CoverGirl foundation that I use too.)

Last night we went to a wedding of a church friend, and it was a fun, happy night. I didn't think about what to wear until this week, not wanting to buy something new when I have clothes in my closet that I rarely pull out. I wore a dress I hadn't worn in a while - white lacy top and black skirt, black tights and black oxford-type laced shoes (weird but fine -- my tall black boots I wanted to wear had disintegrated -- they were that "bonded" leather so had just fallen apart, much like our loveseat). I had my purple Turkish pashmina and my purple sparkle clutch purse (really only use at weddings because Mama likes to tote a LOT of stuff normally).

I put on makeup, and I tried a little "special" eye make up using various palettes I have, mostly from Clinique Bonus Time (although I don't normally wear makeup I have used moisturizer and eye cream from there for several years). It didn't turn out terribly, but neither was it great or really all that special. I need to watch more videos and practice more. It really is artistic, and I am not very artistic, especially with paints or things like that. I am also lazy and impatient, which isn't conducive to a good final product. Possibly I need different brushes for the different colors? And probably different sized brushes too.

Here's how my eyes looked at the end of the night and after I'd scrubbed them as much as I could:

The Meaning of Thanksgiving

GOBBLE, GOBBLE

(When I typed the title I first wrote "meatning" -- what a funny Freudian slip ... although really it's just fat fingers trying to fly. I still need to buy my turkey for next week!)

Yesterday I went to Jane's class's Thanksgiving feast. All four first grade classrooms do that every year. Other grades do other holidays I guess -- Kindergarten was Spooky Science with Dad on Halloween, and we'll find out what the other grades do when we get there. Shawn couldn't come with me because the feast was scheduled during the time he teaches. It was OK on my own though, despite the fact that I feel the twin emotions of inadequate and better than when I'm around the higher class parents who predominantly make up the school we attend.

The program was very cute -- the kids had memorized poems, which they said together, and each had an individual part of a single poem said with two or three others from the class. Jane's part was about a wishbone and the poem was about pulling it, making a wish and the sister gets the bigger half. All of the kids remembered their parts and only a few were nervous (including Jane, who swayed while she recited, something I did EXACTLY when I was Mary in my ~5th grade Christmas play at school ... I remember someone asking me after if I was supposed to sway with the music like that ... nope!). Jane could still be heard and said every word in time!

A few things were problematic, just in the poem selections and the lack of curriculum that discusses the actual horrors of Thanksgiving -- the arrival of pilgrims and what it meant to the Native American populations. There were some cutesy lines about friendship and love between Indians and Pilgrims, and I understand that the full thrust of American history doesn't need to be on display at a first grade recital, but neither should it be sanitized in such a way that we forget (or in many cases have to wait and learn when we're much older, if we learn at all).

This Decolonizing Thanksgiving toolkit has popped up in several places online for me. I have briefly perused it but need to dive deeper, to learn for myself so I can talk about it more clearly and age appropriately with Jane, and possibly steel myself to make suggestions to the school (apparently schools because I saw some pictures from Livia's school's 3-year-old program and there were kids dressed as Indian caricatures and NO NO NO).

There were also a few poems that were subtly sexist -- making fun of "bumbling dad" for not carving the turkey well and being preoccupied with football on Thanksgiving. #NotAllDads? It was minor, but for whatever it's worth (not much), my brain is in tune to spot things like that. If not able to articulate WHY I can at least notice them and realize I'm uncomfortable with it for SOME reason. It was a weird deal.

The feast itself was Chik-Fil-A chicken nuggets, fruit and mini bundt cakes (i.e. the most expensive cupcakes possible, which they asked for by name). I brought half the needed mini waters. My kid is one of the few who does not like chicken nuggets, so it was a struggle. She hasn't been eating breakfast lately (says her stomach hurts so it probably does -- maybe from the ear ache), so I negotiated her to eat one nugget. She had a cookie and one of the bundt cakes, and although multiple kids were having multiple treats the girls across from us pointed out Jane eating two, as if I was supposed to stop her or say something. I have some thoughts/feelings about that too, but no time to unpack them now!

Books for a Younger Me

We've joined a new Sunday school class, and it's still trying to find its footing. We left our previous class after the sabbatical mainly because we wanted a more progressive study of Scripture. I know it's hurt some feelings, and I am disappointed because I loved the people in our previous class and have deep relationships with them. We still see them, of course, our church isn't so big that you can really avoid anyone if you wanted. But it's a different season in our life and things change. Minneapolis certainly changed us.

Anyway, in the new class we're trying out different things and one we're considering is The Wired Word, a resource that takes current events and turns them into Sunday school lessons. For $80/year the leader gets a weekly email with a LOT of information plus discussion questions about 2-3 topics. The one we looked at this last week was about books and their impact on us as people of faith.

One of the questions that stumped me was something like "What book (other than the Bible) do you wish you'd read at a younger age?" Others in the class had good answers, but because of my Swiss cheese memory and despite being a pretty voracious reader, I couldn't think of a good answer. Even now a few days later I don't have a single book I could point to. (One that did come to mind but is not the point is my favorite breastfeeding book by Dr Jack Newman and how I wish I'd had that resource when I was in my nursing relationship with Jane!)

Something I wish I had been more aware of is the colonization of Native Americans in our country. I grew up in a place called Indiahoma, i.e. home of the Indians, and had many classmates and friends who were of Native descent. My attitudes toward them were not always fair, especially when they received school supplies and shoes from the government. Knowing what I do now changes my perspective significantly. But I'm not sure a kid brain could process it fully? But I certainly could have been a less snotty little kid to others!

There's no one book I can point to that's shifted my thinking on this or other matters. But I have read books! I also follow people on social media, especially Twitter, who open my eyes to others' experiences and how words and actions matter.

I signed up to be a Reconciling United Methodist today (who knew you could do that?!), and I think the new Sunday school class will work together to gain a reconciling designation as well. It's a small step toward a reconciling CONGREGATION, which I don't see happening for our church any time soon as much as I wish it would. I will continue to seek steps to seek justice and reconciliation for all people within the United Methodist Church.

Pumpkin Hats and Thank You Notes

I haven't been crocheting much, but I did make a monkey hat for the new sibling of some friends I'd made monkey hats for the first three kids. And I made a couple pumpkin hats -- one for Livia and one for a friend from her school who had a pumpkin-themed birthday party (I also gave her a pumpkin book from the book fair). I didn't get to see the reaction when it was opened, and I haven't seen the mom since, but I hope they liked it. Livia's is super cute, and it's actually cool enough right now to wear hats here!

Jane had her party, so we're slowly working our way through thank you notes. It's so important to me to express gratitude in a written form, even if Jane said thanks when she opened the gift at the party. (And some of the children had left by the time she started opening.) Jane's 7 so can write and is writing the notes. She's also drawing pictures and making it take entirely too long! But they will get done.

The parties we've gone to recently - both for Liv and Jane - haven't come with thank you notes afterward. Some of that is definitely logistics - without an address or a reliable way to give notes what's the point? And another, probably bigger, part is culture - it's not that important here to give written thanks for something small like a $10 birthday gift.

I'm OK with that, but as for me and my girls we'll keep writing our notes!

Edit to add: We got a thank you note for the pumpkin party! The mom didn't know who gave which presents but she did send thank you notes!

Seasonally Appropriate

frost on the windshield from Flickr via Wylio

We lived in Minneapolis during our sabbatical, and I sadly barely blogged about it. I intended to write posts about each of the major (and minor) tourist attractions we visited - what we liked, what we didn't like, tips for them, etc. And *maybe* I still will? Could be good NaBloPoMo fodder.

While there we had very different wardrobes, especially for the girls. We stayed long enough that the cold broke and we were there for a nice spring and verging-on-hot summer. So we got rid of most of the cold-weather gear and clothes, including the girls' snow boots, snow pants and heavy coats.

Unfortunately I also garage saled/consigned/donated all of the layering shirts I had bought for Jane. I'm sure I was mainly thinking that she'd outgrow them before we would need them down here, and also I was trying to "cut weight" and eliminate some things to make packing easier to come home. But I didn't make a mental (or real) note that I would eventually need to replace the long sleeve shirts for Jane!

Enter: COLD SNAP.

Today the high was 43, and it stayed that way all day basically. It's not like I didn't know it was coming, but rather I thought I had long sleeve layering shirts in a bag of Minneapolis clothes (because you know I saved ALL the cute, fleecy pajamas). There were a couple of long pants, some sweatshirts (that aren't uniform-approved) and the jams, but no layering shirts.

Jane went to school today in a tank, her jumper, a sweatshirt (from the used uniform sale), long pants and her jacket, which isn't that warm on its own and she will soon outgrow it too. BLAST these uniform restrictions (must be black or grey, must have the logo attached).

I went to Old Navy and bought 4 layering tops and a couple more bottoms. It was weirdly busy on a Tuesday, although I guess it was during the lunch hour? It was a crowded, yucky feeling store (you know the type with clothes strewn everywhere), but I was able to find what I needed even though the sales weren't THAT great. There's some kind of "Old Navy bucks" deal going on, but the cashier didn't give me mine even though I spent more than $25. ANNOYING.