Parenting Wobbles

SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL!

The refrain when we were at a church leadership retreat meeting on Saturday was overwhelming. Everyone commented on Jane's physical beauty and adorableness.

It's true! She's a precious little moo-hoo who is also very pretty.

But I forget! I know she's beautiful, inside and out, but in the frustrations of life with a "threenager" I can look past her beauty and only feel the frustrations and see her disobedience, defiance and willfulness. Everything feels so hard.

This week she has been sick. Started with a cough on Sunday evening, so I'm guessing she picked up something at church -- passing the peace is NOT my favorite, but especially during cold and flu season. (But partly my fault because I didn't get the hand sanitizer on her hands or make her wash her hands before we took her to the nursery/Sunday school -- I would think they would wash their hands in Sunday school before a snack, but they do not.)

The cough progressed and added a runny nose and leaky eye, which is usually her first symptom of a cold. No fever though, and still she hasn't had one. She went to school on Tuesday and I got a call to pick her up after a couple hours. Her eye was hurting and the school said she had pink eye. We went to the doctor -- possibly our first (second?) sick visit in her 3+ years. Doctor diagnosed an eye infection (so yes pink eye?) and prescribed drops.

Wrestling a 36 pound preschooler (who is 3 feet, 4 inches tall!) to get a drop in each eye is a really difficult thing. I'm going to attempt my first solo drop placement after lunch. It's going to be impossible, as it's really a struggle even with Shawn helping. Ugh.

She is some better, but still sneezy and coughy and tired. So we decided to have her stay home from school today. It is fine, but I'm so disappointed and sure that it's the wrong decision. She'd be having a better, more engaging time at school. When I called the office to tell them she's staying home the secretary seemed to be trying to talk me into bringing her in, because she isn't contagious re: pink eye once she's started her drops, if that's even what it is. But it was too late (to get her together to go and I'd already texted her teacher and asked a friend to bring her Valentine cards by after school).

Yeah. Jane's missing her first class Valentine party and card exchange. She won't get to make her card box craft or celebrate love with her friends. I'm way more disappointed than she is, and it's definitely FOMO (fear of missing out), which I happened to read about on Mommy Shorts this week. But decision made, we're missing out, etc. I know my regret and unhappiness with the decision will fade (probably by this afternoon even).

I also am missing out on alone time for myself, and next week the school is closed for Mardi Gras, which is pretty much the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Oh, and I'm teetering on the verge of being sick myself -- sore throat and just tired, part of it worry about her and lost sleep from getting up in the night again with her from the coughing.