Christianity on The Mindy Project

I watch a lot of TV, and one show I actually really like is The Mindy Project. I like a woman-led project, and the show has laugh-out-loud moments and characters I care about (ish).

But recently there's a storyline with Mindy's "Cool Christian" boyfriend that has me scratching my head and wondering if I should stop watching. Instead I thought I'd just write about it.

Mindy has started dating a pastor, which on the surface sounds great. Christianity being portrayed in pop culture seems like a good thing. Christians are people too, etc. But the storyline unfolds bizarrely and in a way that is incompatible with my understanding of how Christians, particularly pastors, should believe (which flows into how I think they should behave).

Mindy goes to Pastor Casey's church service and watches as he is treated like a rock star in the pulpit (he wears a collar, and the sanctuary is typical pews and raised pulpit area, but otherwise seems like a contemporary-type service). I've never seen a preaching session or church dynamic like that, although maybe I'm just out of it/used to my traditional, methodical church experience.

But how Mindy and Casey's relationship unfolds is definitely weird when viewed through the lens of my expectations of Christianity and pastoral behavior.

There are sex scenes, including a shower one that would be funny if I weren't thinking about "what?!" He asks Mindy to convert to Christianity, breaks up with her when she won't and then changes his mind ("G" told him to make it work/that they can overcome the differences/that she's the one/etc.).

The season finale has Casey deciding to go to Haiti for a year and inviting Mindy to go with him. They're going to live together in a tent for a year -- with plenty of "making love" as he calls it. WHAT?! Would a mission trip anywhere be like that, with unmarried people living together as if it's not a thing?

So I still haven't decided what I think, other than "HUH!?!?" I also know that TV is not at all representative of what life actually is, so maybe that's just what this is? But it still bothers me more than any other ridiculous storyline on TV.

What do you think?

Substances Affect Aging

h/t to my cousin -- thanks!

Waypoints

We took a road trip this week -- going home to see my family for Mother's Day. We had a difficult time finding playgrounds to stop at along the way, although we did find three eventually: one in Denton on the way there (no shade, and Jane got a small burn on some of the equipment!), a really nice shaded one in Mesquite on the way back and one in Shreveport on the way back that was partially shaded so she could only go down one of the five or six slides (we stopped at a non-playground park in Shreveport on the way there and tossed a ball around).

A friend told me about an app you can buy in the App Store for Mac, I think Ontheway or similar, but it's $5 and I don't have an iPhone/it wouldn't work without wifi on the road on my iPod. And I'm still "old fashioned" in liking to work things out on a big screen/use my keyboard and mouse. What a fossil, right? (I'm also CHEAP.)

I did find a website called Waypoints (which I'd never heard of as a term for places to stop along the way but which Shawn used in a non-website context), but the site was wonky and incomplete. I didn't get any useful information from that.

Anyway, Shawn did most of the work after I did some googling. He used satellite images to confirm which parks actually had playgrounds. We'll be making the trip again I'm sure, so we've saved the info and will hopefully find more to expand our options for places to stop that are kid friendly to get out the wiggles. Shawn's already spotted another park in Alexandria that has a splash pad of some sorts that could be really fun in the heat.

It just seems like it should be easier and that information should be available. I guess most people just stop at McDonald's and let their kids play there? I'm sure we would do that if it were raining or something.

I tried to pay attention to our surroundings while I drove, and I saw a water park in Canton, TX, that seems like it might be about halfway -- maybe my sister and I can meet there someday with our kids for a fun summer trip!

Skin

I went to the dermatologist last week. I hadn't been since our move here and the last time I had been dealing with beds bug skin effects.

This time I had a skin check and asked about what I thought was a skin tag in the corner of my eye.

Skin check was ok. Nothing dangerous yet. (I am young, no guarantees against future problems, etc.) But she was very critical of my arms, which "have seen enough skin damage for a lifetime." Lovely. They are quite freckled. I gotta get better about sunblock. I wrestle it on Jane more than I do myself!

Anyway, the skin tag was diagnosed as dry skin or sub? dermatitis. She gave me some hydrocortisone cream to dab on daily after cleaning. It looks and feels better but I swear I still see a skin tag that will keep cracking.

G-R-O-double-S!

Questions

I attend a Bible study on Monday nights, and our leader is amazing. She asks really good questions, including great conversation starters like:

• What was your best birthday memory?
  
• If you could shadow anyone for a day, who would you choose and why?

I've spent time thinking about those, so much that I remember them even months or more than a year later. And last night's question, while not a conversation starter but more of a heart starter, is still tumbling in my head.

What concrete difference in your life does knowing the end of your story make?

We all had to answer, and I rambled something about parenting/motherhood, how I don't think I'd want to be a parent without the end of the story, the Gospel, knowing and feeling God's love. What would be the point? It would be so hopeless and seem cruel.

I'm not sure that's what I really mean -- or my full answer or something. But I thought it was a profound question in any case and that you, my three or four loyal readers, might enjoy thinking about it for yourselves too.

Mom Praise

For all the gretching about moms on the playground I do (and believe me, there's even more I could do), sometimes I actually LIKE other people.

*Record Scratch*

There's a mom I have seen several times at the playground who has two children and frequently watches two others. Hers are 5 and 2, and she is so calm. She's younger than me but I know I could learn a lot from her just from what little I've seen of her parenting.

I love the way she speaks to her kids -- never disrespectfully but always clear she's the mom in charge. She gives them choices -- "we're not playing in the sand today, but you can choose what you'd like to play with next. do you want to swing? or slide? or ...?" It's just much better than my reaction of "NO SAND! ARGH! DIRTY! UGH!" She also plays WITH her kids and moves from pushing one to getting water for another, etc.

I don't even know her name (although I do know her kids' names), but I have gleaned some things about her, both in direct conversation and via eavesdropping (ask Shawn -- I pick up lots of info about strangers wherever we go). I know I just see a small slice of her life, but she seems pretty awesome in that slice.

Related: on Twitter someone sent me a link to a story about how making mom friends is like dating. I'm not sure if that Twitter friend reads this blog, but it would make sense, as she sent it after my mom gripe post. In any case, I haven't made it past first base with any mom friend, but I can't say I've actually tried either. Making friends is hard.

Jane & Mama

Baby Blocks

(By Daddy)

Mom Gripe: Playground Ice Pops

Yesterday I took Jane to the playground. Not an unusual occurrence. When the weather is nice we try to go once a day. I'm not sure if I'll manage that schedule once the temperatures soar, but I digress.

We got to the park -- a short walk away -- and there are a few other families there. Two moms with three kids between them have passed out those rocket-shaped ice pops that are startlingly red, white and blue.

It was very warm yesterday, and the popsicles were melting everywhere. While the moms lounged in the shade, the kids were carrying their melting messes of corn syrup and food dye all over the playground equipment.

I did have some wipes in the stroller, thankfully, so I wiped away in front of Jane while she climbed to the slide (and I was only half paying attention as I was invited to a new moms group by someone I knew who was leaving).

It was so stressful. Mostly the mess, but now that I think about it those sticks were a choking hazard. One of the kids is about 2 and another is probably younger -- about Jane's age. The oldest was 4 or 5 and talked to me while I cleaned -- saying her ice pop wasn't melting on the ground (it was just getting all over her hands and dress before it got to the ground).

The mess kept coming, as the kids stood and gaped at me, while the moms were oblivious. Jane wanted to swing after one time down the slide, so we did that while the other kids continued to get things messy and sticky -- not just the slides/climbing equipment but also several of the riding toys that are around the park.

The moms had a pack of wipes and cleaned up their kids a bit -- and finally told them "You've had enough. Three is plenty!" to much screaming and crying while the box with the rest of the ice pops was thrown in the garbage. But they didn't use the wipes to clean up the playground equipment. If it had been their stuff that kind of mess wouldn't have been allowed and the kids would have had to sit to eat, but since it's communal property who cares? (Their kids afterward got in the sandbox, so I can't imagine the mess their cars would be in ... or how they were going to get them cleaned up before going home since they were both driving luxury SUV type cars.)

I have seen these moms many times, and I know I'll see them again -- at the park, library, etc. So I couldn't bring myself to ask them to clean up the mess, in part because I knew I wouldn't be able to contain my venom. I really wish I had though -- even a simple "would you mind cleaning up the slides and tunnel? They're all sticky from the popscicles."

I did make a snide remark to a grandma who was pushing her grandson in the swing next to ours -- "I've never seen anything like this mess here." And she agreed it was ridiculous.

Thankfully Jane didn't want to climb anymore -- otherwise I would have had to waste more of my wipes cleaning up the gunk. Today it rained and rained and rained, so I'm sure everything will be unsticky when the weather clears and we next go to the park.

I should be less judgy, right? Meh.

Reading Lately

I haven't been keeping up with Good Reads, but I've been plowing through a few books -- mainly on my Kindle via the EBRPL Overdrive service. Here are quick hits about the last four books I've read (mostly this week, thanks to visiting childcare in the form of inlaws!):

• The Book Thief: World War II/Holocaust novel told from the perspective of Death, focused on a particular girl growing up outside of Munich, Germany. Her mom drops her off with a foster family -- I was never clear why, as she wasn't Jewish. Something about being Communist though. They hide a Jew in their basement, so the war and Hitler is an overarching theme and stress. It's not a very happy ending in most respects, I would say. But an OK read.

• The Life of Pi: a novel written as if it were a biography/memoir type thing. It's fantastical about surviving a shipwreck -- from India to Mexico via the Pacific Ocean. I couldn't put it down and was reading while getting ready to go out several times, and at least once I forgot my phone or something else vital. Another less-than-happy ending in some respects. But I really liked it. Not sure if I'll watch the movie that's been made. It came out last year and was up for a bunch of Oscars.
  
  
• The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks: LOVE. This has been on my list (and in my Amazon shopping cart) since it came out several years ago. I think I was leaving R!A when it was first published (or thereabouts). It's about the woman whose cervical cancer cells have been used for research breakthroughs since the 1950s -- without her or her family's knowledge or consent. It raises a lot of issues about research and privacy, but I think what I liked most was seeing another kind of life. It seemed to be presented truly, her family's life, in a respectful but honest way. I've kept thinking about it since I finished it last night.

• Why Have Kids? I picked up this book at the library after my mother-in-law spotted it on the New Nonfiction rack after story time this week. I'd heard about it and definitely heard of the author before. And a book is a book, so I checked it out (along with a Louisiana Lighthouse book that I thought would have pictures -- upon further inspection realized it was curated from Wikipedia articles ... is that a thing now?!). I guess I liked it -- I read it very quickly this afternoon. It was written like a book report or college term paper -- lots of references and footnotes. The author has a child, so there are some personal anecdotes included (you know me, loving the nosy business of knowing about others' lives).
  
  I'm still not sure what her thesis was -- other than women should be allowed to choose whether to have children and society should support either decision equally (as of now society doesn't do a good job supporting either, depending on how you look at it).
  
  What I didn't like was the chapter that basically said women who don't work are doing a disservice to womankind and to themselves (because eventually their partner/husband will die, leave them or lose his job and getting back to work after an extended leave for kids is impossible/difficult). She wasn't saying that herself, but "reporting" on others' research/writings/findings. But she was wishy-washy in her critique, indicating that she initially took issue with the idea but now supports it/agrees with it. She definitely states her belief that women shouldn't solely depend on another person financially for any long period of time. I hesitate to state an opinion of my own, although my actions speak for my own situation at this point in my life, so I couldn't help but feel like it was a bit of a personal affront. I also see the logic in the thinking. So there you go.

I have a couple more books in my Kindle and a few things I'm still looking for that I'll probably have to get in hard copy at the library. I read The Paris Wife a couple weeks ago and am interested in reading some actual Hemingway (I have a feeling I've never actually gotten through any of his works entirely before). I've enjoyed a couple books by Jane Smiley, the 18th Stephanie Plum book, a couple by Laura Lippman one of which I loved (What the Dead Know), a bunch of David Sedaris and Billy Graham's Nearing Home on my Kindle. All free thanks to the library.

Egg Hunting

Eggs on the monkey grass

Finding eggs to put in her basket

I am getting a TON of spam comments lately. Any ideas how to put the kibash on that? Ugh.

We had a little back yard egg hunt for a baby girl today. About 80 eggs to find. It started getting buggy -- yuck -- so Daddy had to help clean up the last ones. She's been playing with the empty eggs inside anyway. Plastic fun ... oh, I'm sure they're not BPA free. Stressful.

Hope you've had a great Easter!

Cousins

Owen came to visit this week on his spring break. The cousins had a great time playing together, and I know Jane is missing him. I wish we lived closer to each other to have a more regular physical presence. We get by with visits several times a year plus weekly webcamming sessions.

Nothing like a cousin hug though!

Red Stick Gators

Hope you're having a lucky day.

I'm processing my weekly Jane photos and found two gator photos I took at the zoo this week. I have been to the zoo three times before this and never seen these guys. Were they always there and I never looked? Are they new? Whatever the case they kind of creeped me out.

Azaleas

The azaleas are blooming in Baton Rouge, and they have been for at least a month. I think they hit peak blooming last weekend.

One thing I really regret that we did at our house when we first moved in was cut down three big azalea bushes in the back yard. I didn't know what azalea meant, or how beautiful they were, and I was pregnant, emotional and my house was full of guests. I wasn't thinking straight.

We have a small bush in our front yard next to our front window. It doesn't bloom much, although there are probably 10 blossoms now. Nothing like the lush displays I see when driving down Highland or in the Garden District.

You live and learn I guess. Wait at least one full year before doing any major landscaping if you can help it.

Pictures of Azaleas at church -- about a week after peak bloom but still pretty.

Goodbye Google Reader

Sad news from Google. They're doing away with Google Reader, the RSS feed reader I've used for ages, probably since it was launched in 2005. I know there are other readers available, but they aren't as good. And this is the one I know, where all my feeds are and what I'm comfortable with. Slowly I'm losing my loyalty to Google, since it probably IS somewhat evil. I should consider moving my blog to WordPress.

I'm not sure how the RSS capabilities for my blog will be affected -- I use FeedBurner, another Google product that may be axed if it isn't already on the block. It's also how my daily emails are sent out (to all two subscribers, me and my mom) -- so that's a bummer although not a major one I guess.

Grrrrrrrrr... How am I supposed to keep up with my blog voyeurism now?! Not to mention my news reading. Waaaaah!

WHINE!

Read: Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake

Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake by Anna Quindlen
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I checked out this e-book somewhat randomly. It was recommended on the same magazine page I'd torn out to remind myself to look up another book (not sure which one now). When I was perusing the EBRPL's Overdrive site I searched for this one and it was available: check out!

Because it's labeled "memoir" I thought I would love it no problem. I love reading people's personal stories -- I'm nosy that way (I do read a lot of blogs, for that very reason) and I just love a good story. But I wouldn't classify this as a memoir at all. It's a collection of essays without the overarching life narrative. At times it's preachy, and it's definitely the work of a journalist, which isn't a bad thing, but it quotes other people a lot and generalizes more than being personal for most of the book.

I don't think it's a bad book, and I'm sure I've liked Anna Quindlen's work in the past. I just think it's geared toward an older reader? I was turned off by some of the things she wrote about motherhood and aging. And maybe it was the honesty that made me want to turn away, but it just didn't do it for me.

I struggled to finish the book, if only to be able to post a review about it and check off another in an imaginary "books I've read this year" list. (Part of me wishes I did keep up with Good Reads so I had an actual record of what I've read. The Kindle keeps a record, including library books checked out. So at least I have that.)

View all my reviews

FWD: How to Write Good

1. Avoid Alliteration. Always.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. Avoid cliches like the plague. They're old hat.

4. Be more or less specific.

6. Writers should never generalize.

Seven. Be consistent.

8. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.

9. Who needs rhetorical questions?

10. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

Thanks, Auntie Sue!

Read: My Beloved World

My Beloved World by Sonia Sotomayor
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This is more than a memoir -- sure it's the story of Justice Sotomayor's childhood and professional life, but it also has solid advice woven throughout. Advice for following your dreams, connecting with family and friends, and caring for your physical well being (as she has with her lifelong diabetes).

I think it's rare that a Supreme Court Justice would be this open about her life -- she even mentions her underwear at one point (a friend made fun of it and taught her how to shop better for herself once she had the means to do so). I can't imagine knowing about Antonin Scalia's underpants (although I did have a logic professor in college who had taken a shower with him when he saw him at his gym in DC ... just to say that he had!).

Anyway, I really liked this look at an inspiring life of dedication, even though the book ends once she becomes a federal judge and doesn't detail her life since. Hopefully she'll write a sequel about the rest of her life when she's closer to having finished it!

I read this as an ebook from the library, but I would love to have a signed hard copy.

(I've been plowing through a lot of books from the library -- the ebook options are amazing! Long live the library!)

View all my reviews

Breastfeeding on Modern Family

One of the shows I watch is Modern Family. It's a sitcom done in the faux documentary style that seemed to start with The Office.

Anyway, last night's episode (which I watched about a half hour after it aired and was tempted to blog about right away), included Gloria, the sexy second wife of the grandfather, nursing her new baby while she signed for a package. They digitally pixilated her boob, and the dialogue made clear that the baby was nursing/not like it was popped off and it was just a boob that she was showing. There were jokes about her breasts, that she is too free with her body, etc.

Most of the time they were making those jokes she was clothed -- with the low cut tops she wears in which you could see even more of her breast than what was pixilated around the baby's head. I really don't understand why the breast when used for its intended function (even fictionally) is something that requires digital alteration lest we be scandalized. But when it's on display for sexual purposes we have no problem with it.

Furthermore, I don't know why depictions of breastfeeding have to be like that -- somehow shameful or sexual. And I guess it stuck in my craw even more because this particular show uses boob humor on a regular basis.

I know my thoughts aren't fully formulated or useful, but I had to put it out there since it struck me as just wrong and distasteful.

Jane Street: August 2010

In the waning days of our time in NYC I took pictures of things I wanted to remember. I was looking through them today. I had such a dumb camera then that most are blurry or weird. But the series of photos I took of the Jane Street mean I wanted a baby named Jane for a long time.